I overdid things at the end of April and am still “in the hole” as far as energy goes. It’s so hard to climb back from deficit when my baseline is already so limited. Plus we got a new round of baby chicks which are living in our second shower, and they’re cute but man do they serve up extra chores.
This episode is an illustration of how one unexpected parenting moment sent me down an energy deficit on track to last a month or more – between “can’t skip” items like taking my kid to the doctor and “won’t skip” activities like going away for the weekend with my girlfriends, I haven’t had the solid week of doing nothing I really need.
COMIC TRANSCRIPT
Pacing, the most useful “tool” in the ME/CFS care kit (ok, the only tool), is hard to do when you’re a parent. Really if you’re anyone, but parenting doesn’t quit just because your energy levels bottomed out suddenly.
So how did I get here, despite working hard to PACE?
Let’s use the SPOONS metaphor. Most days, I can reliably do my self care (meds, food, shower, basic parenting, very light tidying) plus “One Thing”. So I have one spoon a day reserved for “not optional” and if all goes well, I get another spoon, MAYBE two, for an activity beyond.
My partner went out Friday, so I planned a movie night and early bedtime with the kiddo. Just before bed… my kid coughed so hard he puked in the sink…
…which clogged and required two rounds of Drano.
So much for early bedtime.
Saturday the kiddo was still not feeling great… and I had to clean the house because…
Sunday was my husband’s birthday party.
Taco Catering for 20 was WAY TOO MUCH for the 8 RSVPs.
So after picking up all the food at noon…
…I meal-prepped 3 gallon bags of freezer burritos to make sure we didn’t waste food (and money).
*sigh*
Do you want a taco and a cookie for lunch?
???NO???? To a COOKIE???
He’d been home all week with a cough and fever, but he seemed better after resting Saturday.
BRB, checking my kid.
Honey can you come get some lunch?
Alive, but asleep. At 2pm. With a house full of noisy people.
Fuck.
He has a fever? How long?
Friend who is a family medicine practitioner.
I know it’s a pain but you should take him in and get checked for pneumonia.
DAMMIT
PARTY PARTY PARTY PARTY
(really just chatting, we’re middle aged with kids)
Gentle!
Baby Chick
4-yo nibling
Throw it auntie!
1-yo nibling
Pbbbbbbt!
He loves it
Ginger ale + taco
That was a good sleep. Can I stay in my bed?
Tea
Tacos
Paper plates (luckily I don’t have to really host… everyone knows to just help themselves in the kitchen or whatever)
Low key party success!
7pm SO MUCH GUAC
Dad n Kid Time
*TONIGHT ON BATTLEBOTS*
7:30pm
So what’s for dinner?
Is that a joke?
No…?
I have been trying to feed you the $300 worth of delicious tacos for like 8 hours and I just got ALL OF IT PUT AWAY.
I thought that was lunch.
BEDTIME.
Up to this point I have felt ok (not getting whatever germs the kid has – he’s been coughing since February and I’ve assumed it’s not contagious). But as soon as I sit down…
UGH
Swollen glands.
Elderberry
Olive Leaf and other shit
Advil
Qi gong
No alarm
Electrolytes
Still I wake up Monday feeling sore-throaty.
BOO.
This doesn’t necessarily mean I’m germ-sick. One of the joys of ME/CFS type Long Covid is that I get flu symptoms from over-exertion. Think swollen glands, body aches, crushing fatigue, even temperature regulation issues.
But I have to take the kid to Zoom Care (and then an X-Ray at a different location)-
Power struggle over swallowing nasty antibiotic liquid…
…and keep up with basic life tasks like taking all my own pills and eating food. Things my partner can’t shoulder for me.
And since I’ve been feeling better and more stable, I’ve made plans! Wednesday I’m supposed to attend the kid’s school’s STEAM fair and bring a lesson on folding ‘zines, which isn’t fully prepped. And, I have a weekend away planned on Friday that I have been looking forward to for literal months.
And I’m struggling to rest the way I know I must if I’m going to make it there.
I *really* miss my pup.